WHITE SOX/BULLS OWNER JERRY REINSDORF HILARIOUSLY CALLS WRITER JAY MARIOTTI A “PISSANT”

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DISASTER!

STEPHEN STRASBURG

Washington Nationals star young pitcher Stephen Strasburg has a torn ulnar collateral ligament and will need Tommy John surgery. He will be out 12 to 18 months.

The injury is a major blow to the Nationals franchise. Strasburg was one of the greatest pitching prospects in baseball history and received the largest signing bonus of any baseball player ever drafted. He pitched brilliantly at times for the Nationals this season after being called up in June. In 12 starts, Strasburg went 5-3 with Washington with a 2.91 ERA. He had 92 strikeouts and just 17 walks in 68 innings. That’s an average of an incredible 12.17 strikeouts and 2.25 walks per nine innings. Strasburg had a spectacular Major League debut for Washington against the Pittsburgh Pirates earlier this year. He struck out 14 while walking zero.

MLB.com has video of the pitch where Strasburg hurt his arm.

Ironically, the Nationals learned of the loss of Strasburg just one day after introducing the club’s other megasuperstar prospect, Bryce Harper. The Nats had a press conference to introduce the 17-year-old Harper to the media Thursday. The young slugger from Las Vegas mashed 12 home runs (some landing in the third deck) in batting practice before being introduced to the press.

Since Harper is still a teenager and has yet to play even one minor league game yet, a realistic time table for the arrival of both Strasburg and Harper in Washington would be 2012.

UFC 118 PREVIEW

There are a number of intriguing matchups featured at UFC 118 which takes place this weekend in Boston. The Ultimate Fighting Championship comes to the Hub City with a stacked card.

At the top of the UFC 118 card, BJ Penn looks to re-capture the lightweight championship from Frankie Edgar. Edgar upset Penn for the belt at UFC 112 in Abu Dhabi this past April.

The Penn/Edgar matchup may not even be the most popular fight of the evening. Legendary fan favorite Randy Couture takes on veteran boxer James Toney in a heavyweight matchup. Toney is the current IBA heavyweight boxing champion. He is the most famous boxer ever to make the switch to Mixed Martial Arts.

Also on the UFC 118 card is veteran fighter Kenny Florian and Nate Diaz taking on Marcus Davis, another former boxer, in a welterweight matchup.

Nate Marquardt’s bout has been moved from UFC 118 to its own Fight Night on Spike TV.

STRIP CLUB ADDICTION MAY SEND FORMER NBA GUARD TO PRISON

RUMEAL ROBINSON

As a college basketball player, Michigan guard Rumeal Robinson was famous for calmly hitting two free throws with 0.03 seconds left to give a departing Bill Frieder and Michigan the 1989 NCAA title. Robinson was just a sophomore.

As a pro basketball player, Robinson was famous for something else. He’s the guy who regularly spent $20,000 a night, seven nights a week, in various strip clubs. A magazine piece once labeled Robinson a “strip club addict.” Even the New York Times featured Robinson’s tale of woe.

Robinson ended up homeless despite stealing his adoptive mother’s $600,000 home and hawking his $10,000 machine gun.

Now, Robinson faces serious prison time. He is on trial in Iowa facing eight counts of wire and bank fraud. He also allegedly tried to bribe a bank official.

CHRIS FARLEY IN HIS GREATEST ROLE-AS RUMEAL ROBINSON

You may remember the late actor/comedian Chris Farley trying to re-enact Robinson’s free throws in an oh-so-tight #21 Michigan jersey in what was arguably the greatest ESPN promo in history.

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260 POUND POINT GUARD?

BARON DAVIS: HAS HAD WEIGHT ISSUES IN THE PAST

Wednesday, ESPN.com columnist Chris Broussard reported that Los Angeles Clippers guard Baron Davis had ballooned up to 260 pounds this offseason-some 45 lbs over his listed playing weight.

Davis went to Twitter to deny Broussard’s report.

BARON DAVIS SHOWN HERE GOING THROUGH HIS RIGOROUS TRAINING REGIMEN

YOU’RE OLD: “HOME ALONE” STAR TURNS 30 TODAY

MACAULAY CULKIN

Former child actor Macaulay Culkin turned 30-years-old on Thursday.

WORST…MISTRESS…EVAH!

RACHEL UCHITEL

With his divorce now final and his ex-wife running to People magazine, golfer Tiger Woods is officially a free agent again. There’s lots of speculation about what that means but here’s an idea: DON’T go within 1,000 miles of your gold digging former mistress Rachel Uchitel.

Uchitel recently gave an interview where she said she wanted to “rekindle” her relationship with Woods. No Way! Tiger would be smarter to light HIMSELF on fire. More than anyone, Uchitel is responsible for ruining Woods’ life.

Uchitel has apparently had three ways of making money over the past couple of years:

* nightclub VIP hostess

* purveyor of prostitutes and drugs for rich guys

* banging celebrities

Unfortunately, Uchitel sucked at all three jobs and for the same reason-SHE COULDN’T KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT.

Here’s the photo the attorney for actor David Boreanaz’s wife got to take into divorce court. While she was seven months pregnant. It’s a picture Uchitel posed for:

ACTOR DAVID BOREANAZ ALSO HAD HIS LIFE RUINED BY RACHEL UCHITEL

If you want to keep score of how bad a mistress Uchitel is you can add the millions she cost Boreanaz to the HUNDREDS of millions she cost Tiger Woods. Now, THAT’S a bad mistresss!

ALL of Woods’ mistresses (and there were probably 40 of them) managed to keep their mouths shut while he was cheating on Elin Nordegren. Even the ones missing teeth.

JAIMEE GRUBBS

Plus, at least Jaimee Grubbs had enough sense to DENY! DENY! DENY! when confronted by Woods’ angry wife on a cell phone call.

All of Woods’ philandering became public knowledge because the National Enquirer broke the story of the golfer’s infidelities. Their source was a drug-addled party girl named Ashley Samson that Uchitel shot her mouth off to. Uchitel told Samson all about her affair with Woods who then told the National Enquirer (for money.)

UCHITEL AND FELLOW SLUT ASHLEY SAMSON

Uchitel then not only lied about the affair with Woods to the media but lied about the National Enquire as well. Bad move. The tabloid proceeded to CRUCIFY her. In what could probably be a textbook case in future college classes of Yellow Journalism 101, the Enquirer came out with a scathing story accusing Uchitel of being a liar and a homewrecker “who has a reputation for dating married celebrities.”

The Enquirer also portrayed Uchitel as a sexting and drug addict while calling her a “liar” in print. Finally, the tabloid not only flat out says that Uchitel uses drugs but runs a quote from her telling a friend that she LOVES drugs,

“because you have crazier sex.”

HOT GERMAN SOCCER ANNOUNCER GETS NAILED

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SKYDIVER GETS CAUGHT IN TEXAS RANGERS FLAGPOLE

HERE COME THE JOSE BAUTISTA STEROID RUMORS

JOSE BAUTISTA: BRADY ANDERSONESQUE TURNAROUND IN HR POWER

Monday Toronto Blue Jays outfielder hit his Major League leading 39th and 40th home runs. Tuesday, there were suddenly rumors published questioning whether he used steroids.

The most hilarious example of throwing mud against the wall and seeing what would stick happened in Toronto where a Globe & Mail columnist implied on his blog that Bautista MUST be using steroids saying “the question must be asked.” The same paper then sent a reporter to ask Bautista about “Internet conjecture” surrounding his steroid use. (The “Internet” conjecture being started by the paper itself.)