Posts Tagged ‘Washington Nationals’

Jayson Werth is the new Dave Valle

July 21, 2011

 

How bad of a season is right fielder Jayson Werth having for the Washington Nationals? So bad that beer may only cost $2.11 in D.C.

A bar called Duffy’s Irish Pub is planning to drop the price of certain draft beers to match Werth’s current batting average. Werth is hitting a measley .211 right now. Duffy’s stole the idea for the batting average/beer price promotion from a Seattle bar in Pioneer Square called FX McRory’s. Back in the ’90s, FX McRory’s used to price their beer according to then catcher Dave Valle’s batting average. Beer was under $2 for most of the season.

The Nationals signed Werth to a 7-year $ 126 million contract this offseason following his All-Star and World Championship stint with the Philadelphia Phillies. Not only did Werth receive a $4 million signing bonus and a $10 million salary this season, but he will receive a $21 million salary in 2015, 2016, and 2017.

The Nationals are already admitting the Werth signing was a mistake.

Baseball manager quits over contract dispute

June 24, 2011

As ESPN.com phrased it, “Washington Nationals manager Jim Riggleman put all his chips on the table and came up empty.” Riggleman abruptly resigned as the Nationals manager Thursday after they refused to pick up the option on his contract for 2012.

RIGGLEMAN DRINKS HIS TROUBLES AWAY AFTER QUITTINNG JOB

Washington Nationals infielder placed on “Paternity Leave”

April 27, 2011

 

What’s the difference between a good union and a bad one? Here’s an example: Tuesday, Washington Nationals infielder Ian Desmond became the 1st player in Major League Baseball history to be placed on “paternity leave.” Desmond has left the club to be with his wife, Chelsey, who is giving birth in Florida.

Desmond is actually the second MLB player to leave a team to be with a wife who is having a baby. However, Texas Rangers pitcher Colby Lewis’ move was not announced as “paternity leave.” Yesterday was also the first time that a player was placed on the newly-created “7-day disabled list.” The list was specifically created for players with concussions. Ordinarily, players must miss a minimum of 15 days while going on the DL, however Milwaukee Brewers utilityman Erik Almonte will miss just seven days with a concussion. The diagnosis allows players to get proper medical treatment with missing an extended period of time. It also encourages players to admit to having concussions without being penalized.

Meanwhile, NFL players can’t even get medical insurance while they’re locked out.

ELIJAH DUKES IS A STRANGE, STRANGE MAN

February 13, 2011

ELIJAH DUKES: NOW TALKING ABOUT SMOKING WEED BEFORE NATIONALS GAMES AND MANPURSES

The hell with it. Elijah Dukes has retired as a baseball player. In a recent interview, Dukes (now renamed Fly Eli) announced he is embarking on a new career as a Rap musician. He is apparently through with sports at the age of 26 (witness the man boobs.) Dukes was a famous wifebeating, drug user whom the Washington Nationals gave up on after former GM Jim Bowden was bounced by the club.

One year ago Dukes entered Spring Training as the Nationals starting right fielder. After he was cut, nobody picked Dukes up. Dukes’ history of violent and drug-addled behavior was enough to scare away other Major League teams. In one famous incident, while he was playing for Tampa Bay, Dukes left a threatening voice mail to his estranged wife threatening to kill her. Mrs. Dukes, a school teacher, then went to the St. Petersburg Times and played the message back. It said,

“You dead, Dawg. I ain’t even bullshitting. Your kids too.”

Those kids Duke threatened included his own children. In addition to threatening her, Dukes also texted his wife a picture of a gun. Here’s the actual photo he sent her:

Dukes and his wife had the police called to their house at least four times on domestic violence charges. That includes the time he hit her in the face with a pop can. Dukes’ checkered personal life hindered his baseball career. His father was a convicted murderer. Dukes was arrested multiple times before being drafted by the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. He fathered at least five children with four different women. That includes the time he got his mother’s teenaged foster child pregnant.

However, Dukes has a revisionist history take on his failed baseball career. According to Dukes, he has been blackballed by MLB because he told his league-ordered drug counselor about all of his teammates that smoked marijuana. Duke claims that he and other members of the Nationals would smoke weed before games and that they carried the marijuana around in their Gucci “manpurses.”

Dukes has posted a rambling Fly Eli mission statement on YouTube. He talks about having “a good-ass time.” He also talks about “discipline” and how that means going to the bathroom whenever you need to:

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Dukes also posted a ridiculously horrible music video on YouTube entitled “Lust.”

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DISASTER!

August 27, 2010

STEPHEN STRASBURG

Washington Nationals star young pitcher Stephen Strasburg has a torn ulnar collateral ligament and will need Tommy John surgery. He will be out 12 to 18 months.

The injury is a major blow to the Nationals franchise. Strasburg was one of the greatest pitching prospects in baseball history and received the largest signing bonus of any baseball player ever drafted. He pitched brilliantly at times for the Nationals this season after being called up in June. In 12 starts, Strasburg went 5-3 with Washington with a 2.91 ERA. He had 92 strikeouts and just 17 walks in 68 innings. That’s an average of an incredible 12.17 strikeouts and 2.25 walks per nine innings. Strasburg had a spectacular Major League debut for Washington against the Pittsburgh Pirates earlier this year. He struck out 14 while walking zero.

MLB.com has video of the pitch where Strasburg hurt his arm.

Ironically, the Nationals learned of the loss of Strasburg just one day after introducing the club’s other megasuperstar prospect, Bryce Harper. The Nats had a press conference to introduce the 17-year-old Harper to the media Thursday. The young slugger from Las Vegas mashed 12 home runs (some landing in the third deck) in batting practice before being introduced to the press.

Since Harper is still a teenager and has yet to play even one minor league game yet, a realistic time table for the arrival of both Strasburg and Harper in Washington would be 2012.

STEPHEN STRASBURG ALREADY BEING FITTED FOR A NATIONAL LEAGUE ALL-STAR UNIFORM

June 16, 2010

What kind of impact has Washington Nationals rookie pitcher Stephen Strasburg had on the baseball world? Well, let’s put it his way, he’s pitched a total of TWO big league games and already a multitude of writers are pushing him for an All-Star spot.

Among the media entities seriously pushing for a Strasburg berth in next month’s All-Star Game are Joe Buck and Tim McCarver on the national Fox telecast, Yahoo! Sports, the USA Today, Washington Post columnist Dan Steinberg, and the San Francisco Chronicle’s Ray Ratto.

Strasburg is 2-0 with 22 strikeouts in 12 1/3 innings and a 2.19 ERA.

STRASBURGMANIA

June 9, 2010

 

STEPHEN STRASBURG STRIKES OUT 14 IN BIG LEAGUE DEBUT

It may be hard to believe but Washington Nationals rookie pitcher Stephen Strasburg’s Major League debut actually EXCEEDED expectations.

Incredibly, Strasburg struck out 14 (including the last seven batters he faced) while walking none in a 4-2 win over the Pittsburgh Pirates. That was one strikeout short of baseball’s all-time record for a Major League debut. The 14 strikeout/0 walk performance was also historic. That many strikeouts with zero walks has happened only a handful of times since 1900.

New teammate Adam Dunn called Strasburg’s performance “the best-pitched game” he’s ever seen. Strasburg was in complete command and reached over 100 MPH on the radar gun on multiple occassions. Strasburg’s changeup actually registered 90 MPH.

STEPHEN STRASBURG CARD GOING FOR OVER $10,000 ON E-BAY

May 25, 2010

 

A 2010 baseball card of Washington Nationals draft pick Stephen Strasburg is currrently going for more than $10,000 on eBay.

Stephen Strasburg Rookie Card Bids Over $10,000

WHY DID STUART SCOTT JUST REFER TO THE WASHINGTON NATIONALS AS “THE NAZIS?”

May 14, 2010

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17-YEAR-OLD WANTS RECORD BASEBALL CONTRACT

May 3, 2010

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The agent for Las Vegas junior college catcher Bryce Harper is expected to ask for an all-time record bonus in baseball’s amateur draft this June. Jon Heyman of SI.com is reporting that Scott Boras will seek more than the $15.67 million he got for San Diego State pitcher Stephen Strasburg last year.

Last year, Harper was featured in a Sports Illustrated cover story entitled “The Chosen One.” On the advice of Boras, Harper obtained his GED and skipped his final two years of high school. He is currently enrolled at College of Southern Nevada.

So far, Harper has put up insane statistics, hitting .417 with a .507 on-base percentage while slugging .899. The school’s previous record for home runs is 13. Harper already has 21 homers in just 186 atbats. Like last season, the Washington Nationals own the top pick in this years’s draft. Washington GM personally scouted Harper this weekend.


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