Archive for August, 2010

CHUCK LIDDELL SHAVES MOHAWK

August 31, 2010

 

UFC legend Chuck Liddell cut off his mohawk for charity.

BULIMIA ROCKS

August 31, 2010

LISEL PARILLON: CHOMPING COED

Philly girl Lisel Parillon ate 33 tacos in just 9 minutes.

This is the third time that Parillon finished eating 33 tacos in under 9 minutes at a Drinker’s pub location in Philadelphia. This lets her drink FOR FREE for a year. Parillon is a 23-year-old dentistry student from Penn. She’s 5’9″ and is a size “0.”

Parillon is going to enter the WIP Radio “Wing Bowl” and is thinking of turning pro in competitive eating.

TALE OF TWO DEVIANTS

August 30, 2010

MAURICE CLARETT: OUT OF PRISON UNIFORM AND INTO UFL ONE

TONY WASHINGTON: MAY NEVER WEAR ANY UNIFORM SHORT OF BURGER KING’S

This is a story of two of football’s biggest pariahs. One, who was widely recognized as the most famously disgraced college athlete in history, just spent a couple of years in prison after being an armed robber. The other was skipped in this year’s NFL Draft and is known as “dude who raped his own sister.” Both are seeking redemption and shots at professional football.

Maurice Clarett, a running back, had one of the greatest freshman seasons in the history of college football. He ran for 1,237 yards and scored a school record 18 touchdowns while leading Ohio State to the 2002 BCS Championship. Clarett then scored the game-winning td in the Fiesta Bowl. However, after the game, Clarett declared for the NFL Draft. Unfortunately, he wasn’t eligible to play in the NFL until after his junior season. Clarett also lost his college eligibility after declaring for the draft. Following a couple of unsuccessful court rulings, Clarett spent two years in limbo before getting a shot with the NFL’s Denver Broncos. He promptly washed out and was cut in training camp. Faced with a bleak future, Clarett turned to a life of crime. He robbed an Ohio couple at gunpoint, became known as “The Grey Goose Bandit,” and was involved in one of the most famous running back/police chases this side of O.J. Clarett was eventually convicted of armed robbery and spent 3 1/2 years in prison where he reached new lows as a blogger.

CLARETT ARRESTED

MAURICE CLARETT’S PASSENGER SEAT THE DAY OF HIS ARREST

However, Clarett’s story may have a happy ending. He was just released from prison and allowed to sign a professional football contract with the UFL’s Omaha Nighthawks. Clarett will at least get the CHANCE to play professional football this season. Tony Washington may never get that chance.

Washington was a star offensive tackle at Abilene Christian last season. Following a brilliant showing at the combine and going into the 2010 NFL Draft, Washington was projected as a secound round draft pick. Instead, Washington became football’s most notorious registered sex offender after word leaked out that he had been convicted of raping his own 15-year-old sister. Washington then went undrafted and no team signed him as a free agent.

Last week, ESPN The Magazine ran a mildly positive piece entitled “Unforgiven” on Washington. Written by a female reporter, the article explains how the sex between Washington and his sister was consensual and a one-time thing done mainly out of the boredom of living in Mississippi. Still sickening and taboo, but it doesn’t exactly portray Washington as the “rapist” he was presented as. The ESPN piece even reports that fact that even though they had sex, Washington and sister “never kissed.” Ick!!!!

Still, wary NFL teams have fled from the prospect of having a registered sex offender in camp.Washington never got a job offer from an NFL team. Even the UFL, which just signed Clarett, has treated Washington as radioactive.

TONEY SETS BOXING BACK ANOTHER 50 YEARS

August 30, 2010

The results for UFC 118 were just as we had predicted. Boxer James Toney exited The Octagon as a disgraced fat man. It took Randy Couture less than one round to finish off Toney who landed exactly ZERO punches in the fight. One media outlet described Toney as perfectly playing the role of the “fat fool.”

Frankie Edgar defeated BJ Penn yet again to solidify his UFC lightweight title. Other winners on the UFC 118 card included Nate Diaz and Greg Maynard who beat Kenny Florian.

FORMER METS PITCHER BEATS AND KIDNAPS HIS WIFE THEN FEEDS HER RAT POISON

August 30, 2010

You've been Served by Terez Owens

AMBIORIX BURGOS: IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW AGAIN

There’s a reason former New York Mets and Kansas City Royals pitcher was out of baseball by the age of 28 even though he has a blazing near-100 mph fastball. Frankly, it’s because he’s a violent scumbag who likes to hurt women.

Burgos was once involved in a fatal hit-and-run accident involving two women in the Dominican Republic. Although he avoided jail in that case, Burgos was last seen in the U.S. exiting a Queens, New York courtroom where he had just been convicted of beating his wife. Burgos pounded his wife’s head against a wall, beat her then “slapped, punched and stepped on her as she cowered on the floor.” Burgos beat his wife because she suggested they needed to register their children for school.

Now, Burgos is in even MORE trouble. He is accused of kidnapping his wife and attempting to feed her rat poison

ALBERT PUJOLS IS GLENN BECK’S MVP

August 29, 2010

ALBERT PUJOLS

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BECK AND PUJOLS SHAKE HANDS

St. Louis Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols, who recently hit his 400th career home run, was honored by conservative talk show host Glenn Beck at his “Restoring Honor” gathering in Washington D.C., Saturday.

Beck gave Pujols a “Hope Award” for his charity work.

CARDINALS MANAGER TONY LARUSSA ALSO SPOKE AT BECK’S RALLY

BOISE STATE FOOTBALL COACH CHRIS PETERSEN AND HIS BLUE CARPET FEATURED IN THE LATEST ESPN “GAMEDAY” PROMO

August 29, 2010

BOISE STATE FOOTBALL COACH CHRIS PETERSEN SHOWS THE ESPN ANNOUNCERS HIS TRUE COLORS

VIDEO

HOLY CRAP! PITCHER HITS 105 MPH ON RADAR GUN

August 29, 2010

The Yahoo! Sports blog “Big League Stew” has an impressive post in its Saturday edition. Cuban left-hander Aroldis Chapman reportedly threw a pitch that hit 105 miles-per-hour on a radar gun. That’s among the fastest pitches clocked in history.  Chapman pitches for Louisville of the International League. He is expected to be called up to the Reds next week.

AROLDIS CHAPMAN

SKANK ALERT! PARIS HILTON BUSTED WITH DRUGS

August 29, 2010

 

TALENTLESS WHORE PARIS HILTON AND HER HERPES SORE

Celebutard Paris Hilton was arrested in Las Vegas Friday and charged with possession of cocaine. Police say they pulled the SUV Hilton was riding in over after detecting a “cloud of marijuana smoke” wafting from the vehicle. Metro says they then searched the car and found the cocaine on Hilton.

Even MTV openly mocked the moron heiress following her arrest.

GEEZE, HARD TO BELIEVE THERE WAS MARIJUANA SMOKE COMING FROM PARIS HILTON’S CAR

THE DEATH OF BOXING

August 28, 2010

JAMES TONEY AND HIS MANBOOBS AT YESTERDAY’S UFC 118 WEIGH-IN

Sometimes throughout the course of history a photographic image appears that COMPLETELY captures a particular event or moment in time. On such occassions we are witness to HISTORY. Rarely do such moments happen in sports. Thanks to the brilliant work of Steve Cofield of Yahoo! Sports, we had such a moment yesterday. The image was a rather unpleasant one-James Toney’s ass crack:

Welcome to August 28, 2010-the day that the sport of boxing died. Toney is a respected heavyweight boxer (hell, he’s the current IBA Heavyweight Champion) who’s making the transition to Mixed Martial Arts. Toney is fighting Ultimate Fighting Championship legend Randy Couture at UFC 118 in Boston tonight. Couture is going to kill him. Toney weighed in at 237 pounds. That’s the heaviest he’s ever been in his entire career. In fact, it’s more than 20 pounds heavier than Toney weighed in his last boxing match. As Toney makes the switch from boxing to UFC, it appears he never trained for his fight against Couture. Unbelievable!

Last year, UFC surpassed boxing in total pay-per-view buys. UFC has already FAR surpassed boxing in popular culture. Hollywood cast Rampage Jackson in “The A-Team” and Randy Couture in  “The Expendables.” Quick, other than Manny Pacquiao or Floyd Mayweather Jr., name a boxer. ANY boxer?

Notice UFC president Dana White chortling in the background of Toney’s weigh-in. White’s a former boxer. He knows that when Toney (a heavyweight champion for Christ’s sake!) goes out and get’s his ass kicked by a 47-year-old man the sport of boxing is officially dead. NOBODY will take boxers seriously ever again. The only fans the sport has right now are over 60 anyway. Boxing will have officially died with Dana White as the sport’s personal executioner.

The way it look’s now, White hand-picked Toney as the “big-name” fighter to make the jump to UFC. White chose well, picking a lazy, stupid, undisciplined athlete who didn’t even bother to train for the event. Then, he apparently sent boxes of donuts up to Toney’s room every night. Friday’s weigh-in made Cofield wonder out loud, “Did Toney take this fight seriously?” Find out the answer tonight at UFC 118.