Posts Tagged ‘Buffalo Bills’

STEVIE JOHNSON DROPS GAME WINNER, CRIES, BLAMES GOD

November 29, 2010

 

Well, it’s finally here. After thousands of athletes praising a higher power in their moments of triumph, we have the first recorded instance of an athlete blaming God for his failure. Wide receiver Stevie Johnson of the Buffalo bills dropped FIVE passes in an overtime loss to the Pittsburgh Steelers. That included a potential game-winner where Bills quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick hit a wide open Johnson in the endzone. Unfortunately, Johnson dropped the ball and the Bills lost.

In the postgame press conference Johnson broke down and cried causing the CBS in-studio announcers to openly mock him. Even worse, Johnson took to his Twitter account following the game and found somebody else to blame for the Bills loss. He literally blamed God. Johnson dissed God by Tweeting (in all caps):

“I PRAISE YOU 24/7 !!!!! AND THIS IS  HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! I”LL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO…”

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T.O. IS S.O.L.

March 1, 2010

TERRELL OWENS

The Buffalo Bills will reportedly decline to offer wide receiver Terrell Owens a new contract.

BUFFALO BILLS CONSPIRACY THEORY

January 19, 2010

Apparently, Chan Gailey is failing upwards.

While other National Football League teams have already made a huge splash this offseason by hiring big name coaches like Pete Carroll and Mike Shanahan, the Buffalo Bills drew a collective yawn yesterday by choosing 58-year-old retread Chan Gailey as their new coach.

Gailey is a former Dallas Cowboys and Georgia Tech coach. Just four months ago, Gailey was demoted as offensive coordinator of  the Kansas City Chiefs. He  didn’t even make it out of the preseason. That follows a mediocre six-year run at Georgia Tech where disgruntled alums bought out Gailey’s contract. Gailey also has the distinction of being the first coach in Dallas Cowboys history who did NOT win a Super Bowl. He was 18-14 in two years as the Cowboys head man and  is the guy who kicked off their14-year drought of not winning a single playoff game.

Why would the Bills hire a guy with that type of resume? Simple. According to Ben Maller of Fox Sports Radio, it’s a conspiracy. Maller contends that the Bills hiring of Gailey paves the way for a franchise move to Los Angeles. Maller also points out the ways in which the Bills hiring of Gailey identically mirrors the Rams franchise-killing moves by owner  Georgia Frontiere before she skipped town from L.A. and moved to St.Louis:

* Like the Rams, Buffalo has hired a failed “no buzz” retread coach

* According to Maller, this is a deliberate move by the Bills. They are HOPING Gailey will lose.

* A losing team in Buffalo will “turn off” the fan base and allow ownership to skip out of Buffalo for Los Angeles with little attention

TERRELL OWENS: MALE MODEL

December 10, 2009

TERRELL OWENS

Controversial NFL receiver Terrell Owens has signed a deal with Wilhelmina Models in New York. Wilhelmina is one of the world’s biggest modeling agencies. They say their plans are to place Owens in a number of fashion magazines.

BUFFALO BILLS FANS TAKE OUT BILLBOARD TO FIRE COACH DICK JAURON

October 19, 2009

LOCAL BUFFALO TV STATIONS FINALLY SHOW VIDEO OF LEODIS MCKELVIN PENIS LAWN ART

September 19, 2009

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Several local tv stations have now shown video of second year Buffalo Bills cornerback Leodis McKelvin’s vandalized lawn. A pair of irate 16-year-old Bills fans spray painted a penis and the score of the Bills/Patriots game on McKelvin’s lawn following his game-losing fumble against New England in Week 1 of the NFL season.

 

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BASTARD SON OF KARL MALONE MAY BE BILLS NEW LEFT TACKLE

August 29, 2009

 

KARL MALONE: ONCE IMPREGNATED A 12-YEAR-OLD

Did you know that NBA legend Karl Malone once got a twelve-year-old girl pregnant? It’s true. It happened when Malone was a teenaged college freshman at Louisiana Tech.

Now, the child that resulted from that coupling may be the new starting left tackle for the Buffalo Bills. Demetrius Bell is a seventh round pick who’s never taken a snap in an NFL game. Nevertheless, ProFootballtalk.com is reporting that the Bills hate tackle Langston Walker so badly that they may give his job to Bell. Both are looking to replace Pro Bowler Jason Peters who went to the Philadelphia Eagles this offseason.

Bell and his father are completely estranged. Bell says they have no relationship. The two never met until Bell was 18.

 

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BILLS FULLBACK IS ACCUSED OF BEING A MAJOR PERVERT

May 16, 2009

coreyMcIntyre

COREY MCINTYRE

Buffalo Bills running back Corey McIntyre was arrested in Florida Thursday and charged with “exposure of sexual organs.” McIntyre is accused of riding his bicycle to the house of a 59-year-old woman and masturbating outside her window.

Since it’s Florida, McIntyre’s storyon tcpalm.com is right next to an article about a man arrested for “naked vandalism.” that guy’s mug shot was even better than McIntyre’s.

 

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ANOTHER FLORIDA PERVERT-MAN ACCUSED OF “NAKED VANDALISM”

FORMER BUFFALO BILLS QUARTERBACK, CONGRESSMAN, AND VICE PRESIDENT CANDIDATE JACK KEMP DIES AT 73

May 3, 2009

 

Obit Jack Kemp

 

JACK KEMP WAS CHOSEN AS THE REPUBLICAN VICE PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE BY BOB DOLE IN 1996

BUFFALO FANS WELCOME T.O.

March 31, 2009

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TERRELL OWENS