Posts Tagged ‘Cleveland Cavaliers’

Greatest Chris-Bosh-looks-like-a-tansvestite reference in broadcast history

April 1, 2011

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Sure, former Notre Dame basketball star Austin Carr may have been a bit of an underachiever during his NBA career with the Cleveland Cavaliers. However, Carr has more than made up for his pro shortcomings as an an annoucer for the Cavs.

Carr had already established himself as a local broadcast legend for his work with Fox Sports Ohio. He is even popular with Buckeye State college kids who established the “Austin Carr Drinking Game.” This week, Carr added to his legend by getting off the greatest slam on Miami Heat big man Chris Bosh EVER. During the Cavaliers/Miami Heat game, Carr called Bosh a “RuPaul look-alike.”

SOMETHING ELSE FOR CHRIS BOSH TO CRY ABOUT

Awesooooooommmmmmme!

Carr’s comments are beyond hilarious. Sure, Bosh has had a soft and womanlike season, including the now famous incident where he cried “like a bitch.” Still, to have an NBA announcer compare Bosh to a transvestite on live television? Genius! Comedy gold, Jerry. Comedy gold.

Carr, like everybody else is Ohio, now hates defected star Lebron James and all of his Miami Heat teammates.

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AUSTIN CARR

CLEVELAND SUCKS

December 3, 2010

Thursday night was a bad day to be from Cleveland. In his mega-hyped return, former Ohio hero LeBron James, now the most hated man in C-town history, made his return to play against his former team the Cleveland Cavaliers. Things didn’t work out so well for Cleveland.

James and his new Miami Heat team spanked the Cavaliers so badly that the sellout crowd, that had wanted to explode, ended up spending most of the game in stunned silence. Final score: Miami 118 Cleveland 90. James finished with 38 points in just three quarters. He outscored the Cavaliers entire starting lineup.

The Cavaliers were so pathetic that SI writer Ian Thomsen says James turned the entire city of Cleveland, their owner, players, and fans into “victims.” After the game James was such a “preening dickhead” that Fox Sports columnist Jason Whitlock  called him a “lost cause.” Whitlock said he was giving up on James because of “the classless way he exited the city” of Cleveland. James also got killed in a variety of national chatrooms.

FAIL: CLEVELAND CAVALIERS 2011 CALENDARS FEATURE LEBRON JAMES

October 13, 2010

CAVALIERS COACH WEARS TIE WITH SWASTIKAS ON IT TO MEDIA DAY

October 6, 2010

BYRON SCOTT

Oops! Cleveland Cavaliers coach Byron Scott inadvertantly wore a tie featuring swastikas on it to media day.

CLEVELAND BREWERY MAKES “QUITNESS” BEER IN HONOR OF LEBRON

July 17, 2010

The Great Lakes Brewing Company has decided to “honor” departing Cleveland basketball star LeBron James by naming a beer after him. The Cleveland brewery says “Quitness” will be a “dry and bitter ale” in honor of LeBron.

The company instantly sold out of its first 30 gallons of the new brew.

DELONTE WEST TO PLAY HOOPS WHILE WEARING ANKLE BRACELET

July 15, 2010

DELONTE WEST

Cleveland Cavaliers point guard Delonte West is most famous as the player who was allegedly having sex with LeBron James’ mother. Now, West may be famous for something else. He may have to play the upcoming NBA season wearing a court-ordered ankle monitor following a weapons conviction in Maryland.

West also faces domestic violence charges from an an incident last October involving his wife. He could be suspended by the NBA following his weapons conviction or even waived by the Cavaliers.

VIDEO of arrest.

THE LATEST LEBRON JAMES T-SHIRT

July 13, 2010

FAMED DOG ABUSER QYNTEL WOODS MAY REPLACE LEBRON IN CLEVELAND

July 11, 2010

Qyntel Woods of Poland's Asseco Prokom reacts as he sits on the bench during their men's Euroleague basketball game against Lithuania's Zalgiris in Kaunas March 3, 2010.

THERE WAS A TIME WHEN QYNTEL WOODS COULDN’T SHOW HIS FACE IN NBA ARENAS

Even back in Portland’s bad old days of the “Jail Blazers” there was only one player who was such a scumbag that he had his arrest filmed by local tv crews. That player was former first round draft pick Qyntel Woods. Woods was also the only player that was such a miscreant that the Blazers voided out his contract.

Prior to the Michael Vick incident, Woods was the most famous athlete ever convicted of dog fighting. He was convicted of first degree animal abuse in 2005 for staging dog fights in his house.

Now Woods may be returning to the NBA-as LeBron James’ replacement in Cleveland no less. Sunday’s Cleveland Plain Dealer listed Woods as a possible target for the Cavaliers after the former convict finished on the Euroleague first team All-Offense and All-Defense this past season.

LEBRON MURAL TAKEN DOWN IN CLEVELAND

July 11, 2010

NBA PLAYER ACCUSED OF SLEEPING WITH HIS DAUGHTERS TOTALLY BUYS THE POINT GUARD SLEPT WITH LEBRON’S MOTHER THEORY

May 22, 2010

Rather than dying off, the “Delonte-West-slept-with-LeBron’s-mom” Internet e-mail fueled story actually seems to be picking up momentum. Even non-sports media outlets like Fox News are running with te story.

Meanwhile, former NBA player Calvin Murphy is claiming OTHER Cavaliers players may have had sex with Gloria James. Murphy says he KNOWS Mrs. James hooked up with Delonte West and the two have been plaing “horizontal poker.” You’d think a guy who was once accused of having sex with his daughters might be a little more careful in throwing around allegations.