LEAST SURPRISING SPORTS STORY EVER

 

JOHNNY WEIR

Big Shock. It turns out figure skater Johnny Weir is gay. Weir is coming out of the closet with his new biography, “Welcome to My World.” In the book, which will be released Tuesday, Weir says, “In a sexual way, I’m gay…”

JOHNNY WEIR FORCED TO RESPOND TO RUMORS THAT HE’S A WOMAN OR EVEN *GASP!* HETEROSEXUAL

JOHNNY WEIR

A pair of idiot Canadian announcers from Quebec are in trouble after making homophobic comments against flamboyant American figure skater Jonny Weir. The announcers said he was a “poor example” for other skaters and even suggested he be forced to undergo gender identity testing.

In response, Weir felt compelled to hold a press conference to state that he IS a man.

video

Weir did make some rather open ended comments that might be interpreted to mean he’s slept with women (below video.) This follows an ESPN.com article that flat out states Weir may be STRAIGHT heterosexual.

&fmt=18

ANOTHER FIGURE SKATER GONE BAD

ANDREI LUTAI BOOKING PHOTO

Russian figure skater Andre Lutai was arrested in Lake Placid, New York on drunk driving and car theft charges. His bail was $100,000. Lutai finished 9th in this year’s World Championship.

 

TONYA HARDING: STILL A BALL (KNEE) BREAKER

TONYA HARDING THEN

TONYA HARDING NOW

Newsday media critic Neil Best has posted a review of this month’s HBO appearance of Tonya Harding on his Watchdog blog. Harding is interviewed by Bernie Goldberg on the latest edition of “Real Sports.” The interview does not disappoint-that is if you’re a fan of watching a disgraced, double-digit-i.q.’d, chain smoking piece of trailer trash embarrass herself once again on national television.

For those of you who are too young to remember, Tonya Harding was a figure skater and once one of the most famous female athletes in the country:

Then she lost it all when her ex-husband and a collection of goons tried to literally whack her competition, ice princess Nancy Kerrigan on the leg and knock her out of the Olympics. The incident eventually evolved into the biggest scandal in Olympic history. The ex-husband and everybody else got caught and were found guilty of assault. Harding was found guilty of covering up evidence and hindering the police investigation of the case. Harding’s fall was complete:

 

 

However, through a series of legal maneuvers, Harding was allowed to compete against Kerrigan in the 1994 Olympics.The ensuing matchup of good (Kerrigan) versus evil (Harding) led to the biggest television ratings in history at the time. To this day, the Kerrigan/Harding Olympic matchup is the highest rated non Super Bowl sporting event in American history.

In recent years though Harding has faded into obscurity. She surfaces in the media from time to time but only as either a punchline (through her numerous bouts with the law), or a punching bag (as a celebrity boxer.)

Her name has become synonymous with dirty tricks. Both the Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton campaigns referred the “Tonya Harding option” during the presidential election. It was not a compliment.

During the recent HBO interview, Neil Best writes about this classic exchange between Bernie Goldberg and Tonya Harding:

 

Goldberg: “You’re a piece of work.”

Harding: “Do you think I care what other people think?”

Goldberg: “Apparently not.” 

Awesome!

I have to confess to having a soft spot for Harding despite her reprehensible Olympic past. After all, she was the only major celebrity and world class athlete who the average guy could look at and legitimately think, “I have a shot at that.”

At the peak of her fame and popularity Harding married a guy who drove a forklift. Harding’s hobbies are drinking 20 mugs of beer, playing video poker, chain smoking, and making sex tapes of herself. In other words she, not Nancy Kerrigan, is the All-American girl. At least if you live in Las Vegas.

 

WHO DOESN’I LOVE THE CONCEPT OF THE MARLBORO SMOKING CHAMPION FIGURE SKATER?

TONYA HARDING: FROM ICE SKATING CHAMPION TO COMMUNITY SERVICE FOLLOWING ARREST